Writing About Writing

About how productive I was today.

I am totally uninspired today.  I sat there attempting to work on a fanfic piece and I think I may have got a whopping fifty words typed.  I instead got distracted emptying out my email accounts, looking for a sound dictionary, which I might add, there is not one.

I was trying to write sounds, or the sound of fabric falling and all I got was fwoof. Yeah, see that word, or non word, just doesn’t sound like something you would want to hear.  So I challenged my friends on Facebook to help me start a sound dictionary.  Things like swoosh, foof, fwuf, splat, plop, etc.  I actually got a fair amount of help, for which I am grateful.  I love sounds, and I want the right sound at the right spot.  However, some sounds just don’t seem to exist in written word.

Well, after fiddling around with nada in writing, after dinner I finally sat down and attempted to put a very, very odd dream into words.  That is always a challenge 12 hours after being awake. The dream has usually faded some, and sitting there trying to describe the weirdness of it was a challenge.  Not that I was keeping it for anything important except my journal.  And trust me, no one wants to see my journal.

I guess writing about writing, which I am doing here, is still writing.  Not very exciting writing, but it’s still writing.  I just feel a bit guilty that I haven’t done anything terribly constructive today.  I got tweaked about the horrendous not me query letter that I thought I had down.  Yeah, not so much.  So it’s back to the drawing board so to speak and not following a real query letter.  It all depends on the agent you find, and well the one I want has his own preferences.  I was not following the preferences.  So now I’m starting from scratch, slightly lost, and hoping I get back in the swing of things.

I seriously understand why people don’t like writing query letters.  I can honestly say I hate writing mine.  I don’t do query letters. I do fiction. Well, I hope I do fiction.  I even started questioning my books that I want to submit because of a comment someone gave me.  I sat there second guessing myself wondering if I’m not really good enough.  It’s a horrible feeling. Feeling like maybe you are making the worlds worst decision.  That feeling  has fortunately faded. A bit. Okay, a smidge of me is still second guessing myself.  I hope it goes away after a few more nights of decent sleep.

Lack of sleep is an amazing motivation killer.  Yeah, I may be a night owl, but staying up till 3AM isn’t probably the most healthy thing in the world. And doing it for three or more days straight. Yeah, recipe for disaster.

So I guess as I always sign off………

Writing on

~K.L.B.